Reasons Why You Don’t Have Friends
A life without friends can be incredibly lonely, can’t it? But if you’re stuck at home on a Friday night wondering why everyone is hanging out with their buddies while you’re sitting at home alone, you may start pondering the reasons why you don’t have friends. Well, in all honestly there can be a lot of different reasons why you’re lacking in the friendship department. We’re going to go over some of the biggest reasons why you don’t have friends, as well as some solutions to fix this terrible problem.
Reasons You Don’t Have Friends
Let’s face it: sometimes there is ‘someone’ in the group that gossips to everyone else in the group about their ‘friend’. What kind of friend does that? It’s rude, and shows that you lack actual care, respect, and love for them. If you have a tendency to gossip about people you call your ‘friends’, then you can rest assured you will be left empty handed when these so-called ‘friends’ discover your bad mouthing. Gossiping is never a nice thing to do, so in this situation, you can’t really blame them for leaving you high and dry.
You Choose a Relationship Over Them
Some people make the terrible decision of choosing a relationship over their friends. They go ALL in for their new lover, completely ditching their friends and leaving them behind. They believe that the relationship is more important and will last forever, therefore they don’t really need to be with their friends any longer. While a new relationship is fun and exciting, it is absolutely no reason to ditch your friends and act like they don’t exist. Your friends will be there before, during, and after the relationship, if of course the relationship turns sour. They will always be there for you as long as you don’t ditch them for a new guy. Friends don’t like to be replaced by a relationship that may or may not work, so it’s no question why you may find yourself without friends if you keep abandoning them for a fling.
You Don’t Care About Them
Do you ever ask your friends how they are doing, or is it ALWAYS about YOU? Some people are incredibly selfish and only care about themselves. If this sounds like you, your friends are going to notice after some time. They will realize you don’t really care about them and only worry about yourself. Friends don’t do that!
You’re too Jealous
Jealousy in any situation is just plain annoying. If you’re the type of person to get jealous when your friend is talking or hanging out with someone other than you, they may feel like you’re smothering them and can’t be cool with that fact that they have other friends too, even if you are their ‘best’ friend. Nobody wants to feel like they are stuck in one single relationship and don’t have the opportunity to venture out and have fun or even talk to other friends.
You Don’t Like to Do Things
Your friends most likely want to go out and do things! If you’re the type that just likes to sit at home alone playing video games or watching tv, they will probably stop asking you to hang out because they know your answer will almost always be ‘no’. When someone is friends with a homebody, it’s just plain boring for them; they may even feel like you don’t want to be around them outside of work or school, which can also be hurtful to them.
You’re Unpleasant to Be Around
Of course your friends will be there when you’re having a bad day, but is EVERY day a bad day for you? Are you constantly in a bad mood? Maybe you’re always complaining about something or someone. Perhaps you’re angry at everything around you. Maybe you’te always down and out about every little thing in life. If you’re simply unpleasant to be around, eventually you’re going to push your friends away too.
How to Make Friends
Without confidence you may have a difficult time talking to people and meeting new friends, The first step to getting more friends is to work on your confidence. There are plenty of ways to boost your confidence, but the best way is to look in the mirror and describe everything you like about yourself. If there is anything you don’t like- say you want to lose a few pounds or work on your anger- fix them so you can feel better yourself and be on your way to a confident individual people actually want to be friends with.
Learn to Be More Social
This can be hard, especially if you are a shy person. But even a shy person can work on their social skills! The best thing to do is try to make small conversation with people around you, whether it’s the person you’re ordering a coffee from or your siblings. Try and find things to talk about and take it from there. If someone approaches you for conversation, accept it and carry on the convo.
Join a Club or Hobby Group
One of the easiest ways to make friends is to join a club or hobby group with people who share a similar interest. Perhaps you love art, then join a group where they do art projects regularly. If you’re a sports person, join your sport of choice and play and bond with people who also enjoy the sport. Since everyone shares the same interest it will be easier to find things to talk about.
Care About Others
If you find yourself being on the selfish side, and that’s why your friends have left you, then you need to work on your caring skills. Caring about others makes them feel special, loved, and wanted, and they will want to stick by your side to share these feelings.
Get Out of the House
You simply can’t make friends unless you leave the house; unless of course you find friends online, but 9 times out of 10 you will never meet those people, so the friendship doesn’t go as far as it could. Get out of the house and meet people. Maybe pick up a college class so you can meet other people, or get a job where you’re around other individuals often. Simply going to the gym, a club, or sitting around at a coffee shop can also up your chances at meeting people.
Rekindle Old Friendships
If you used to have some friends but they’ve tapered off, there’s no reason why you can’t try and rekindle these relationships- even if the two of you left off on bad terms. Try connecting with them again. If they stopped being friends with you for a particular reason, let them know you are working on whatever the issue was, and you’d like to try and be friends again. This is an easy way to get your friends back- especially if you apologize for whatever the problem was and promise to be a better friend.
There’s no reason why you need to continue to be lonely. Find the big reason why you no longer have friends, work on the problem, and start making new friends today; you will be glad you did.