20 Signs a Guy Is into You

By on October 30, 2014

We’ve all seen the movie He’s Not That Into You and learnt that if he rarely ever calls and doesn’t reply to message he isn’t that into you. You probably also learnt front he movie that it’s not a good idea to stalk a guy or send him five hundred messages a minute. Really. It’s better to choose a guy who is chasing you and keep him somewhat at bay until you know he is really worthy of your attention. After all, you do not want to end up with someone who turns out to be as bad as your mother when it comes to telling you how to live your life, or worse: turn out to be the stalker you are not (because checking his Facebook doesn’t make you a stalker. Really, it doesn’t. Ahem). And by taking your time to evaluate if he is really worthy of your attention, he will sense you value yourself and it will make him want to fight for you to win you over. This is an irresistible thing for a man – they always need to feel they had to fight to win something or someone over, or they won’t treasure it. Some “fighting dragons to rescue the Princess” kind of complex. 

So whilst you are in this “evaluation phase” how can you tell if a guy is into you? Because just like women, men suffer from the “temporary attraction syndrome” on a rather frequent basis and may, just may, fight the dragons to win you as a prize, rather than a long term girlfriend. Read on to find some surefire signs that the guy you are thinking of turning into a serious boyfriend is truly into you.

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1. He Introduces You to His Friends

Chances are if he introduces you to his friends in a setting where you actually have a chance of getting to know them, he is trying to show you off, which means he likes you.

The exception to the rule: he might just want someone to look good on his arm. It can also be he isn’t sure about you and want his friends’ opinion.

2. He Introduces You to His Parents

If he introduces you to his parents it usually shows he is very serious about having a relationship with you. Most people save the family for people they truly care about.

The exception to the rule: he might have a nagging mother/father who wants him to date more. The odds of this being the case is slim, but if you ever had a grandma that bugged you once a week about your marriage plans, you might understand.

3. He Includes You When Talking About the Future

At first most men won’t talk about anything further than the week ahead. Then they start including you in plans slightly further away, like the coming summer vacation. When they get really serious, you are included in plans for years to come.

The exception to the rule: many women contemplate what someone’s surname will sound like after their own name before the first date, even if they don’t think through what a marriage with that person would really be like. It’s the same as seeing a celebrity in a magazine and thinking you’d want a date with them, even if in reality you might not like them one bit. We all daydream with our heads in the clouds sometimes without actually tying it to reality and men are guilty as charged on this account as well.

4. He Replies to Messages

Too many times women fall for “hard to get” men who are only available when they feel like being available. If a guy replies to text messages most of the time then it shows he cares beyond playing hard to get. Of course, you shouldn’t test him by bombarding him with texts as that could end up scaring him off instead – he needs to know you have other things on your mind than him. That you have a life, in other words.

The exception to the rule: some men simply don’t know how to politely stop a conversation and keep replying even if they don’t want to. Other men reply to messages as they enjoy the conversation, but don’t really want anything more than a flirt.

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5. He Takes You out on Dates

A guy who always wants to meet in casual places (like at home on the couch in front of the tele) and can’t really be bothered to take you out for a good time is likely not to be that interested. If, on the other hand, he is trying to impress you by taking you on various different dates, then it shows he cares enough to want to make a good impression.

The exception to the rule: some guys prefer casual all round. Going to restaurants, or going out for drinks isn’t their thing. Other guys want to impress everyone and pay incredulous sums of money just to look good in the eyes of any and all women. They aren’t trying to impress you, not really, they are trying to impress their own ego.

6. He Does “The Little Things”

If a guy sends you cute goodnight messages, holds doors for you, leave you nice notes to find in your house, buys you flowers or other gifts and in general makes an effort to show he cares, he is most likely interested.

The exception to the rule: a man who naturally does all these things without putting much thought into it. He would treat any woman he dates this way and it doesn’t mean he is that into you. If you haven’t yet had sex he could also just still be playing the “conquering” game. Fighting dragons to get to the princess, in other words.

7. He Calls You for Advice

A man who respects you often wants your advice on important issues. Some men will never think to ask advice, but those who do usually only ask the people they truly value.

The exception to the rule: a man who just loves discussing his problems and would talk to a wall if it would only reply to him.

8. He Doesn’t Mind Your Less Flattering Sides

A guy who shows up with chicken soup when you are sick and allow you to sneeze all over him without getting bothered is probably in love with you.

The exception to the rule: a man who has been picking up stray dogs since he was a kid and can’t help but help anyone who he thinks is in pain.

9. He Shows His Vulnerable Side

Most men are uncomfortable showing their vulnerable side, so when they do it’s with people they really trust and value.

The exception to the rule: a man who knows that by showing his vulnerability you will like him more and is using it for that purpose rather than simply sharing something. It could also be you have met a man who is genuinely frail, or someone who sees you as more of a friend than a lover and therefore doesn’t mind showing what he thinks to be a less impressive side of himself.

10. He Wants to Spend Time with You

If a guy likes you the first thing he will want to do is spend time with you to get to know you better and simply to enjoy your company. If he is constantly suggesting you see each other again it means he really enjoys your company.

The exception to the rule: some guys are busy so whether they like you or not they might not have much time to commit. Others will want to spend time with you because they feel lonely, or like you as a person, but don’t necessarily want to date you.

Signs a Guy Is Really into You 3

11. You Hear Others Telling You He Complimented You

If you start hearing other people tell you that a guy has said nice things about you (or simply can’t stop talking about you) it usually shows he has a genuine interest in you.

The exception to the rule: he’s a natural charmer. Some men love women and they will show it. It doesn’t mean they like one woman more than the rest, however.

12. He Smiles a Lot Around You

If someone can’t stop smiling when around you it’s a telltale sign they really enjoy your company and might even be in love with you. We’ve all had that silly grin on our face at one point or another, haven’t we?

The exception to the rule: a man who’s simply happy and smiles all the time.

13. He Gets Jealous

When a guy gets jealous it means someone has stepped on what should be his territory. If he thinks you are his territory he is likely very into you.

The exception to the rule: some men are real alpha males and want to protect anything and anyone in sight.

14. He Posts Photos of You Two Together on Facebook/Instagram/Twitter

If someone is ready to show you off to the world, that’s a pretty clear declaration of being in love.

The exception to the rule: he could just be trying to show off to satisfy his own ego.

15. He Like Staying Close

If a guy keeps touching you; holing you hand, stroking your hair, kissing you, etc. he feels good being physically close to you, which is a pre-requisite for a happy relationship.

The exception to the rule: some guys love being close to women full stop, whereas others aren’t “cuddle material.”

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16. He Celebrates You

If you’ve closed a sale at work, or gotten a scholarship he shows up with wine, takes you out for dinner or uses some other gesture to share the special moment.

The exception to the rule: just like there are people who aren’t big on compliments, there are people who aren’t big on celebrations. Some people simply don’t celebrate their own successes very much, nor others.

17. He Remembers Anniversaries and Other Big Days

He remembers the day you met, the day you became a couple and the day you had your first date. He celebrates some of these anniversaries with you. He also puts in an effort to make birthdays, Christmases and Valentine’s Days special.

The exception to the rule: some men will never be good at remembering dates and special occasions and/or however hard they try they will still not learn to pick the right gifts. It’s not because they don’t care, it’s because they aren’t great at it, or think it much less important than giving you hugs and kisses every day.

18. He Steals Glances of You

If a man is caught time and time again staring at you with a look on his face that indicates he is happy, turned on, or in general stunned by adoration, it shows he’s into you.

The exception to the rule: some men stare at anything in skirts.

19. He Tells You So

If a guy keeps complimenting you and tells you he really cares about you, chances are he really does. He might even say I love you – three big words in a relationship, often not spoken lightly.

The exception to the rule: some men just like women and therefore compliment and care about them all. Also, sometimes a guy wants to make someone happy and croaks out he loves her even though he isn’t one hundred percent sure himself. He might also have gotten smitten really badly, but it’s attraction and not love he is feeling – some guys aren’t great at telling the two apart.

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20. He Tries to Impress You with His Humor and Charm

Usually when a guy tries to impress you it’s hard not to notice. Suddenly he is cracking jokes, opening doors, bragging about his skills and showing off his muscles in front of you.

The exception to the rule: sometimes a guy just wants female attention.


1507760_10152392614860079_8379465670289960282_n copy 2By Maria Montgomery – Maria is a freelance writer, director and social entrepreneur. She’s also the spokesperson for The Little Angels Community Center. You can find her somewhere between Cape Town, London and L.A., where you will most likely find her in the hills, looking out over the city she loves. @OhMyMontgomery


  1. Avatar


    July 18, 2019 at 9:31 am

    Hi my name is Karen,
    I have a crush on my friend. We’ve known each other for 7 months, ever since I met him and he asked me for my number we’ve been talking every single day. I was in denial that I liked him, but 3 months ago he told me that he likes me but was scared to tell me, a week later I told him I like him to. He always text me in the morning and give me attention, if I don’t text him he will send me a text every hour to see how I’m doing. He always ask me for advice and send his pictures to me and ask me if I like them, we also do video calls to, and we call each other husband and wife when we text each other. However, a month ago he told me that he doesn’t like to do long distance relationship, but it’s not long distance to me cause we live in the same city. (I think he’s just scared to be in a relationship with me) and he told me that he was scared to make the first move (he said he don’t want to make the first move, and I think it’s because he thinks that I’m going to reject him, to be honest I don’t know why) I just want to know if he actually likes to be in a relationship or just want to be close friends? Are there any advice that you can give me?
    Have a nice day:)

    • web admin

      web admin

      July 18, 2019 at 3:11 pm

      He is interested in maintaining a relationship with you, but is he scared of being rejected. His thoughts regarding a long distance relationship is based on your current relationship that seems to be based on social media or over text. He wants to nourish this relationship by spending additional time with you in person. Make a decision about what you want for the future of this relationship, and speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Karen!

      • Avatar


        July 18, 2019 at 6:23 pm

        I mean it’s obvious that we both want to be in a relationship with each other, but he’s scared that I’m going to reject him. (Honesty I don’t know why). And lately he had been very distant with me and not giving me the attention that he used to give me. What could this mean?? Thanks for the advice

  2. Avatar


    July 5, 2017 at 6:02 am

    Hi ! So there’s this guy, Luke. He’s my brothers best friend, so they hang out lots of time. I have a CRUSH on him… He and I have been texting on whatsApp for 3 years EVERYDAY. He keeps the conversation going when it’s dried up. And if I ignore his message, he will DEFINITELY text again after a few hours to gain my attention and keep the conversation going. However, here’s the tricky part, he and I barely meet up together and when we do. He turns awkward and avoids my gaze, and not talking to me. I feel bad because he text a lot but wouldn’t talk to me in real life. PS when I’m far away he will stare at me and feel embarrassed when I notice. However, when I ask about his crush, he say he don’t have a crush…. Also he gets jealous ( I think ) when i text him asking about his boys classmates, he will either back talk them (eg insult them ) or ignore my message then text again a few hours later with a new conversation!! ( I think it’s a sign he’s jealous, what u think?) Btw my friend told him that I like him before so….if it helps, he usually send me GIFS , meme, Songs links, Upcoming movies, pictures of stuffs he bought or doing ( never pictures if him tho, well just once ), videos of what he’s doing etc cuz we have A LOT IN COMMON than his normal friends and he has. (Btw i heard a rumor by his friends that he likes a girl in his class the year I met him, 3 years ago, so I’m scared he likes her instead of me) I really liked him and I although I’m pretty sure he likes me based on the web searches (signs he likes me through texting etc) I am scared of ruining this friendship. Plus it will be embarrassing when my brother knows I asked his best friend out…help? I want him to ask me out and I need to know does he like me and will he ever ask me out? Btw our culture is that u hv to be at least 18 to get a gf/bf and he’s 17 this year. Thanks!!

    • web admin

      web admin

      July 5, 2017 at 1:31 pm

      It sounds as though he is interested in you. At the very least, he thinks of you as a very close friend. If you are concerned about your brother’s feelings, then speak with him about any questions that you may have. Your best option is to speak directly and honestly with your crush about your thoughts and feelings. There is no reason to allow cultural norms to stop you from entering into a relationship with someone that you have strong feelings for. Have a great day, Emily!

  3. Avatar


    April 8, 2017 at 8:51 pm

    and even marc keeps saying that he knows that i like sam but even then he keeps asking me if i have a crush on anyone?

    • web admin

      web admin

      April 9, 2017 at 9:24 am

      He might not be certain about how you feel, or he may hope that you actually like him. Whatever the case, you should probably just say who you like. If your crush never finds out you like him, he may never have the confidence that he needs to make a move. Good luck, Veronica!

  4. Avatar


    April 6, 2017 at 6:28 am

    there is this guy in my class called sam and i have a crush on him.his bestfriend marc keeps asking my bestfriend zarah if i have a crush on sam.she obviously replies no.but then a few days back marc told zarah that sam has a crush on this girl in 9th grade whereas sam is in 10th.marc always used to tease me about liking sam.but then for a few weeks he stopped and then he started again.and also the girl in 9th grade posted a picture and he commented saying”my choice aint that bad”.Marc also knows that zarah tells me everything.

    • web admin

      web admin

      April 6, 2017 at 10:09 am

      It sounds like the friend thought that you would be a better choice for Sam to date. It sounds like he is starting to move on, but it might not be too late yet. Instead of having Zarah say that you don’t like Sam, have her tell the truth. Each time she says that you are not interested, he thinks for sure that you don’t like him, which may be one reason that he is moving on. If you or Zarah just said the truth, then he would know that you like him and be more likely to make a move. It might not be too late, so do something about it now!

  5. Avatar


    December 1, 2014 at 7:13 pm

    when you wake up in the morning and see the first thing on your phone is good morning beautiful thinking of you

    • web admin

      web admin

      April 14, 2015 at 10:43 pm

      That is a great sign. Plus, it is one of my favorite ways to begin the day. Nothing makes mornings a bit easier to deal with than finding out that someone cares about you.

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