Dating Argentinian Men
Is it just me or is the mere thought of dating Argentinian men kind of appealing? Maybe it’s the tango, the accent, or the hot temper, but there is something to be said about Argentinian men, isn’t there? I found this quote by Marlene Dietrich which might sum it up: “Latinos are tenderly enthusiastic. In Brazil they throw flowers at you. In Argentina they throw themselves.”
The Bar Scene
Expect men to approach you when you are having a night out. The Argentinians aren’t afraid to make contact. Contact of the more physical kind. You might have to repeat the phrase ‘no’ repeatedly if someone isn’t to your liking.
Boys be boys. At least that’s what it seems like in Argentina.
Most men and women live at home till finishing university and usually for a while longer. This means that some men leave their mother’s nest at the ripe age of thirty. As a result they don’t know how to cook, clean or do the laundry. Of course there are exceptions to this though.
Mothers tend to call their sons more often than they do in America, say a couple of times a day, or at the very least a couple of times a week. The sons will also call their parents for help about anything and everything. At least the support network is working!
People are generally close to their family, see them at least once a week and if you end up marrying an Argentinian man, you will have the same kind of close-knit family.
There are so-called love hotels, or ‘telos’ in most cities. Why, you ask? Because people live at home for so long that it becomes a problem when they are dating someone and can’t get it on in their bedroom at their parents.
Smooth talkers or ‘chamuyeros’ are what we would call players. Only they often play at an even higher game. When charming and innocent foreigners come to town these men will tell them exactly how beautiful they are, how much they adore them and want to be with them, how in love they are and so on and so forth. All to get the girl and then leave her.
As in any country you will simply have to be aware of the players. And whilst Argentinians often get passionate much more quickly than the average American and throw praise around like it was confetti, they don’t necessarily mean it at the same depth as the American guy you’ve dated for two months who finally manages to croak out that he quite likes you. It’s not them being insincere, it’s just part of the culture. And you have to know that the “I love you” after two weeks of dating is not the same “I love you” as after six months of dating.
Take it slow and you will soon weed out the insincere ones and keep the good ones. Who are just as passionate and adoring. And they really are adoring.
Maybe they’ve watched too many soap operas or their Latin temper is as heated as the sun, but Argentinians can be the jealous types and they don’t mind starting a fight over it. If someone checks you out for too long in a bar and dares to say hello, your Argentinian date might just get very angry with them.
Apparently the first couple of months in a relationship can be times where you are tested. Maybe he plays hard to get. Maybe he tries lying to you. Keep talking straight and he will either get the hint or leave.
In general just be prepared for a few dramas, exaggerated stories and lies. Blame it on the heat.
I spend a lot of my time in L.A. so I thought I knew flakiness first hand – people will promise you anything and not deliver. Turns out the Argentinians can be worse than the Angelenos. Again, I’m prone to blame it on the weather as it seems the heat goes to people’s heads. Just beware that dates might be cancelled last minute, time-keeping isn’t taken seriously and a few white lies may be thrown about as far as excuses go. ‘Leaving home now’ might actually mean in an hour. It’s not that unlike the South African expression ‘now, now’ which means any time from now till tomorrow. Sort of.
Men Take the Lead
Expect the guy to court you and take charge by coming up with dates, picking you up, paying the bill, etc. He will hold doors for you, not because he thinks you are an inferior creature, but because it’s tradition.
You should be wary if he tries to invite you to his home too soon for “dinner” or doesn’t take much care arranging the dates. Whilst he might be flaky at times, if he does care he does put some effort into the dating. Also, he will likely take pride in paying for your drinks, so if he starts telling you how much your drinks cost, he might not be all that into you.
As mentioned he will also likely be passionate right from the start so expect to get complimented.
By Maria Montgomery – Maria is a freelance writer, director and social entrepreneur. She’s also the spokesperson for The Little Angels Community Center and an avid blogger. You can find her somewhere between Cape Town, London and L.A., where you will most likely find her in the hills, looking out over the city she loves. @OhMyMontgomery