What to Do When You Miss Someone

By on November 26, 2015

When someone is gone through death, moving or a break up, learning how to handle it can be difficult. For months afterward, you may have problems trying to let them go as you work through your pain. Even if the person has just moved, learning how to deal with them being far away can be a trying experience. When this happens, you can use these tips to feel better and learn how to grow into a happier person.

Get Outside

The first step in any list of what to do when you miss someone is to get outside and explore the world. When you are sad, it is far to easy to just allow yourself to curl up in a blanket and watch a season (or five) of shows on Netflix. If your goal is to get over your loss and move on, you need to get outside into the world. You will never make new friends or move on when you are just alone at home. You need distractions to keep your mind busy, and meeting new people can give you a chance to focus on something new.

Start a Journal

Interestingly, study after study has shown that keeping a journal is one of the best ways to ensure your long term happiness. This is perhaps due to the fact that a journal allows you to sort through your feelings and express yourself constructively. In the modern world, you can use your e-mail account as a basic form of a journal. Write out your feelings and e-mail them to your account everyday. You can learn what triggers some of your feelings of loneliness and the journal can help you to feel like you have someone to talk to.

Ending Addictions

Now that you are already going through a difficult time, this is a great time to go ahead and quit addictions like coffee or smoking. It may sound like a crazy idea, but it actually works. Dealing with withdrawal symptoms will get your mind off of the person that you miss. As an added benefit, you will be able to live a healthier and happier life once you are no longer addicted to caffeine or nicotine.

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Get a Gym Membership

Each day, get in the habit of going to the gym. Even if you are only there for five minutes, make it a part of your daily ritual. Working out is shown to boost the endorphins in your mind, which can lead to a more positive outlook on life. Additionally, working out will keep you busy and could mean that you end up meeting other people. As a side benefit, a regular workout routine will get you into shape and give your self-esteem a boost.

Be Thankful

As you start to heal, you will start to remember the good times instead of just the bad memories. Even if you are still upset with the person for leaving, you can still remember the good times. Use these feelings to write a letter about how much this person meant to you and thanking them for the ways that they changed your life for the better. As you do this, it will help you to heal and bring closure to the relationship.

Other than thanking the person that you miss, you should try to be thankful for three things every day. Studies have shown that people who express gratitude on a daily basis are happier and emotionally healthier. Each day, write down three things that you are thankful for. These things can be as simple as thanking your cat for cuddling you, or you can be thankful for random acts of kindness like a free coffee or help on a difficult project at work.


Stay Connected

When you are depressed or lonely, it is far too easy to just sit at home and think about the person that you miss. If you want to escape from these memories and start to heal, you need to connect with the people around you. Your friends can help you get your mind off of what happened and bring a smile to your face again. Additionally, your friends know you best, so they are the best people to help you recover and start living life again.

listening music

Turn on Some Music

Have you ever found yourself becoming depressed after listening to a sad song? It is not just a coincidence; music can really influence the way that you feel. If you start to listen to happier songs and upbeat music, it can help to change your outlook on life. For an added bonus, try dancing and singing along to the music—the extra endorphins that are released can help to give your mind a boost.


Boost Your Brainpower

You have a chance at this point on your life to focus on self-improvement. When you miss someone, you have extra time where they are no longer a part of your life. Instead of using this time to mope, do something productive. Try to learn a new language, set a goal to read ever Jane Austen novel or learn a new instrument. All of these things can help you to focus you attention, do something productive and recover. If learning a new instrument or a language is too much for now, try just getting outside to an art gallery, a concert or a seminar. The main thing you should remember is to get out and explore the world. Focus on self-improvement and keeping your mind busy, and it will be easier for you to recover.

Date Someone New

There are many reasons why you might miss someone. If you miss someone because you were in a romantic relationship that ended, then it might be time to meet someone new. Even if you are not ready for a new relationship, you can try just dating around or having a fling. At the very least, you might end up meeting someone who could be a great friend. You have to move on in life, and meeting someone else will help.


Avoid Alcohol and Drugs

When you are depressed, turning to the bottle is far to easy. For a brief period of a couple of hours, you may feel better and happier. Once your hangover sets in the next day, those good feelings will be gone and you will feel worse than ever. You do not want to drink or use drugs as you are trying to get your life back. In addition to just making your problems worse, it is far too easy for alcohol or drug abuse to turn into an addiction. Instead of drinking or abusing drugs, do some of the other things on this list instead.

Moving on after someone leaves your life is never easy. Through the steps in this article, you can begin the arduous process of recovering. During this time, surround yourself with friends and family who can support you. Stay busy by learning new things, working out or listening to music so that you do not have time to dwell on the past. When you do need to express your feelings, do it constructively in a journal and remember to always be thankful for the positive things that still remain in your life.


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