Don't Miss

    I Miss Him But He Doesn’t Miss Me

    By on September 9, 2015

    It’s undoubtedly one of the worst feelings in the world: you and this super special guy have been getting along for quite some time, going on dates, texting all day, and having the time of your lives. And then suddenly things take a turn for the worse and you find yourself arguing a lot more, those special dates and romantic moments seeming to disappear into the night. And as the story would go, the two of you break up, and you’re left devastated and heartbroken.

    But wait.

    You can’t help but notice that nothing has really changed on his end. He goes about his day to day business, laughing and smiling with his friends, classmates, and coworkers, without a care in the world. He doesn’t seem to be broken in the slightest, and worst of all- he doesn’t miss you. While you’re sitting in your bed with a few teardrops running down your cheek, waiting with anticipation for him to send you an ‘I miss you’ or ‘I’m sorry’ text, he’s out having the time of his life not missing you a bit.

    What gives?

    First of all, let me tell you this much: you’re NOT the first lady this has happened too, and you WON’T be the last. So don’t ever feel like there is something wrong with you or you’re somehow lesser than anyone else. This is just something that happens, as terribly awful as it is.

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    Do you really miss HIM?
    Love. It’s SO confusing, right? Every aspect is just an endless spiral of confusion with no way out. And of course, it’s the same for when you breakup with someone too. That being said, do you really miss HIM? Or do you simply miss having someone around that loves you and cares about you?
    Think about it- and I mean really THINK. Was it HIM that did anything special for you, or was it just the moments and feelings the two of you shared? Nine times out of ten, we just miss the moments. We miss the good morning text messages and the silly dates at the park where you fed ducks and sped around on scooters like you were in junior high. And most of all, we miss the deep hugs and fireworks every time we kissed.

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    Why doesn’t he miss ME?
    I don’t know about you, but I’ve been in this position before; and it’s AWFUL. “How can he not miss me? How can he act like everything’s normal when it’s NOT? Did he never care about me in the first place? What is WRONG with me!” And ladies, before you send your brain into an emotional train wreck of thoughts and conclusions, take a peek ahead at some of the reasons he might not miss you.

    He’s just not showing it. I think by now we all know that the majority of men aren’t really all that ‘emotional’. They don’t display affection very well and they definitely aren’t going to let us- or anyone else for that matter- see them cry. So why on earth would he let you know that his heart is truly aching? He may just be keeping his emotions in-tact and not letting his real feelings shine through. In this particular case, you’ll probably end up hearing from him sooner than later. Nobody can leave their feelings bottled up without doing a single thing about it.

    He’s being strong. Not to say you aren’t strong, but maybe there’s another thought process going on inside of his head. Maybe he really DOES miss you, but he knows there’s no future with you. Yes, that’s some very cold hard truth, but it needed to be said. Sometimes, even though we may be deeply in love with someone, we know that the relationship will eventually fail. The two of you may have a deep connection, but be on totally different pages about very important things. If you weren’t able to work out these differences before the breakup, then you probably aren’t going to do it now.

    He’s keeping himself busy. He’s probably decided to pick up that extra shift from work just so he doesn’t have to go home and be tempted to pick up the phone and call you. Maybe he’s decided to pick up a class at the community college or has taken up a new hobby to keep his mind off of things. So, you saw him out with his buddies three days in a row, huh? That must be because he totally doesn’t care the two of you broke up, right? Absolutely wrong! He’s probably just trying to have some FUN and take his mind off of the hurt he’s feeling on the inside. You know what they say, laughter is the best medicine!

    He met someone else. Ouch, yes. This is probably the one you didn’t want to read. But hey, if this is the case, you’re going to find out soon enough anyways, right? Yeah, it will probably add even more ache to your heart, but sometimes these things happen. He may have met someone else and is totally infatuated with them, leaving you to be a part of his past and nothing else.

    He never really cared. Ladies, we all know that there are men out there who are just flat out jerks. They play too many games! They say one thing: “Oh you’re the best girlfriend ever, I hope we last forever” with ten thousand kissy face and heart emoticons, but the next day they completely change their tune: “Oh, yeah hey sup” five hours after reading our text to them. Sometimes men just play games and never really develop actual feelings to begin with, even when they say they do. In this case, of course they aren’t going to miss you. (On the other hand, there’s a few guys out there who will realize they really had feelings for you AFTER the breakup- in which case they’ll let you know!)

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    What should you do if you miss him?
    There is definitely a RIGHT way and a WRONG way to handle missing a man. First things first..

    Hold the memories close to you. Just because the two of you broke up doesn’t mean you have to completely remove him from your memory. While it may seem like a good idea to pretend he doesn’t exist, it will actually do you a big favor in the long run to hold the memories close. Look back on those moments with a soft heart, thinking “Those WERE some wonderful times, but there is better times ahead!” Because yes, those were great times in your life and they shouldn’t be forgotten- just stored away, and certainly not chased.

    Let him know how you feel- ONCE. You’re hurt because the two of you broke up. You miss him terribly and want him back. It’s A-OKAY to let him know, as long as you do it ONE time- so make sure you have all of your thoughts in order before you send him the long text or voicemail. Don’t be the girl that’s bothering him every other hour of the day with ‘I miss you’ texts or ‘Please come back to me’ voicemails; these are just annoying, desperate, and will push him away even further. Letting him know how you feel and how important he is to you ONE time will put the thought in his head and let him know what’s going on without pressuring him. If he feels the same way, he will let you know.

    Don’t stalk him. I know it’s tempting to keep checking his Facebook or Instagram to see what he’s doing and who he’s with, but you really need to stop. That’s going to make the situation a million times worse. Out of sight out of mind, remember? Okay, maybe he will still be lurking in your mind quite often, but it’ll only make the thought of him more prominent when you’re checking up on him every five seconds. Seriously, get a life lady! 🙂

    Have some fun. Now is the PERFECT time to call your gal pals and head down to the salon. Switch up your hairstyle- do something bold or keep it simple- and get a fresh coat of paint on those fingernails and toes. You’ll feel a million times better about yourself, and getting out with your best friends is always an easy fix for a broken heart. Hey, maybe there will even be time for a nice restaurant or bars after the pedicures, too? Just ask the bartender to make you something to fix a broken heart- I’m sure he’s got a super awesome secret recipe that will make you feel a little bit better!

    So, quick recap: it’s totally okay to miss your ex-boyfriend, but just make sure you do it the right way. Let him know how you feel ONE time; if he wants to be with you, he will let you know. Anything else will just make you look desperate. Keep a smile on your face, ladies!

    124 Comments

    1. Shayna

      July 16, 2018 at 6:09 pm

      Me and my boyfriend been together for 4 years now. We live together about 6 months ago. We were the type of couple that everybody seen us as a cute couple and that we were meant to be.we did everything together! We never fought ever until we started to move in together. We broke up about 2 months ago because we would always fight about something stupid. We would fight about when he broke up with me the last time he would talk to all the other girls. And write songs about them in his notebook. And it wasn’t long when he did that to me because we broke up recently. It was like he was quick to move on from me. He would keep saying that was a long time ago we were broken up when I did that lets just focus on us lets be happy together but i just couldn’t let it go. I had to know why he did that instead of moving on from the subject. So we would fight everysingle day about it. But most days we would have a great fun amazing days with each other. So 2 months broken up. 2 weeks ago he calls me and says want to hang out. We hung out twice. We would go to this place and dance to a band he would spin me and everything and would just stare into my eyes at least 5 mins. after it was over he would hold my hand to walk me to my car. He says your going home tonight I said yea he says I don’t want you to go home tonight because it was late to drive he said you can come stay with me I said ok we hug kiss. And I follow him to his apartment. We had so much fun. When we got to his apartment he said can I cook for you are you hungry. I said yea so he did and we eat watch tv then he put on some music and we dance in the living room. We kiss made out and then we cuddle. The next morning he cook me breakfast and then he said I’m sorry I don’t think we are going to work things out. I don’t think we should live together and be in a relationship. And my heart just drop…. I look at him and I said what about last night and what we did he couldn’t give me an answer is to why he did that. His friend when he was hanging out with him his friend text me saying I thought y’all would get back together by the way he was talking I said what was he saying about me. He says he really cares about you and loves you but doesn’t know what he wanted. I felt the old us that night when we was hanging out having fun.and now he block me from everything where I can’t reach out to him. He seems so happy I see photos and videos of him beging so happy. So why did he do this to me. Will he ever miss me AGAIN? Is he really happy does he miss me after what we did that night we hung out twice. Will he come back to me. Is his happnnies that I see an act or is he really is happy. When will he start to miss me like I miss him and start to be an this situation like I’m in. I seen a future with this guy. But I think he was just using me. But the second time that we would hang out was him and his friend he called me and said hey there’s a band playing want to go with me and my friend and I said yea. So I pick up him and his friend in my car we drove park and me and my ex dance SPINNING me around again like the 1st night. When it was over we went to my car I let him use my charger he was sitting in the front his friend in the back. and I seen him texting this girl saying her name with a ! AND a (: and he said sorry I was in a loud band I’ll send pics and he said I’ll message you tomorrow. And then thank God! She called him in facebook Message I looked at his phone because I was like who’s that and he said nobody and it was a girl calling him. I finally drop them off and I looked at him before he got out saying it’s either me or her you have to choose. And he said what I don’t know her and don’t even like her like that. But they been texting each other and said I think she’s fake. Good thing she was just a fake account. Now I know who he really is. So I’m just wondering when will he start to miss me and be in this situation like I’m in right now and for him to think he messed up and come back to me. He’s still doing this after everything after that night and that 1st night. How can he do that to me and be happy and move on so quickly. After he has done everything to me he’s making feel like it was my fault he said if you just didn’t fight. But I had reasons to fight with him because he’s still doing this to me. I guess he wants to live his life and see what’s out there.

      • web admin

        web admin

        July 17, 2018 at 11:59 pm

        It sounds as though the two of you have a complicated relationship. There are more influences and considerations for you to weigh. Determine what you want for your future. Decide if this relationship is viable. You will find benefit in reducing stress in your life. Have a great day, Shayna!

    2. girl

      June 7, 2018 at 10:27 am

      hey, me and a guy had such an amazing relationship, and everything was good and fun, and we really had a blast! after we where together the last time, it turned cold for 1,5 week. I thougt it world go back to normal, but he called me to say he didnt want it go get serious anyway, and couldnt see us as long-term. He also kissed another girl that night. I understand that it maybe was the “chase” he liked, but he had earlier said he wanted to get serious with me and wanted me to meet his family. Something happened in that 1,5 week which changed everything in his mind. One of his friends killed himself, but he didn’t tell me about it before breaking up. I am not sure if it is possible to change his mind back to before, or if it is too late because he thinks the new girl is sweet?

      • web admin

        web admin

        June 8, 2018 at 10:02 pm

        He has decided to establish a physical relationship with someone else. The death of his friend may have caused him to reevaluate what he wanted for his future. He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. He is unable to maintain a relationship with you at this time. Determine what you want for your future without him. Have a great day, Girl!

    3. Distressed

      April 20, 2018 at 9:29 am

      A few months ago I met a guy who I got along with really well, we had great chemistry. He asked me out to watch a movie and he held my hand on that first date. He never said anything but was always suggestive with his actions. A few weeks later I asked him if he liked me and he said yes, but ever since that day he has been avoiding me (it has been close to a month). I’ve been thinking about it and felt that maybe he’s acting this way because I never really gave him a proper reply to his confession.

      I sent him a long text detailing everything about 4 days ago and he hasn’t opened it yet. I’ve been trying to live my life and forget him but it has been hard. I didn’t know it was possible to form such a strong attachment to someone I only knew for 2 months or so. What should I do now and what do you think about the situation?

      • web admin

        web admin

        April 20, 2018 at 9:36 pm

        It is likely that he is confused or uncertain about your feelings toward him. You are right, as he may be unsure of how to proceed that this time. However, you have attempted to contact him. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. There may be another reason why he is not attempting to nourish a relationship with you at this time. If he reaches out to you, share your thoughts and feelings with him at that time. Have a great day, Distressed!

    4. Pookie

      March 13, 2018 at 4:26 am

      I have been in a lifeless marriage for over 9 years because we had a child together. We have no physical contact with each other it’s just like we are roommates. I ended up falling in love with a man I work with. We where together almost 5 yrs. We saw each other 2 to 3 times a week and I am totally in love with him. I know our relationship started out as what people will call a sin bit I truly feel he is my soulmate. I was going to go through a divorce and be with him. He left me a little over 2 months ago. I am still in the process of the divorce because I know if I could have a affair then there’s no reason to stay married. I just found out he is seeing someone else had he has cut contact with me and shut down his Facebook page. I want him back. I miss him he was my best friend. I love him so much. What do I do?

      • web admin

        web admin

        March 13, 2018 at 3:23 pm

        You are married. This other person is in a relationship and has stopped communicating with you. You will find great benefit in determining what you want for your future. Determine what would be best for your children and your for your future. Speak directly and honestly with your husband about your thoughts and feelings. After your divorce is finalized, then it is appropriate to attempt to nourish a new relationship. Have a great day, Pookie!

    5. Anxiety

      March 7, 2018 at 1:26 pm

      Sorry for the rambling mess.

      We’re about to hit our 1 year in a few months, but I’m starting to break down and I can’t handle this chest crushing anxiety I’ve been having over the weekend.
      A month ago he told me he didn’t know if he could return my feelings, that he didn’t know if he could see an “us” in the future. But we continued on after that, there was a lot of crying though and he took the day off of work saying he wanted to be with me. His actions said “I love you” but he started to say it less.

      Just last week he randomly popped by my house, he did it the night before at my request, but this time it was unannounced and he claimed to be there to comfort me since I was going through a mental breakdown, alone, with my mom in the hospital. He then started to grab some of his things and put them in his car, and just straight up barraged me with compliments, then said I’d be better off finding someone else, someone who could treat me better? I couldn’t think straight, so I can’t exactly remember everything that happened that night except we ended up not breaking up because I told him he never really gave it a chance. I probably should’ve just let him go that night but something told me otherwise.

      I haven’t seen him at all since then, little contact throughout the weekend aside from the good morning snapchats, then on Monday we played some online videogames together. I got on topic about a dress a friend gave me and he was asking for pictures of me in the dress, then he said he wanted to come over.. I denied him, because everyone was already in bed and my family isn’t too happy with what he’s done so far. So I asked to set up a date for Tuesday, I’ll wear the dress to dinner, too. He said yeah, we planned everything out.

      The next morning he cancelled, saying he had to write an appeal letter to the college he’s trying to get into, this came out of the blue, but I said okay and asked if we could reschedule. He said he didn’t know if he’ll have the time to? Then I asked again today. He said he still needs to finish writing it because he got distracted…

      I’m so confused if he just won’t straight up tell me no, or if he really is just continuously getting distracted because I know he’s a terrible procrastinator. I miss him terribly, I want to give him space to figure himself out though, so I won’t see him at all this weekend instead I was going to hang out with my brother. I’m just tired, there’s friends saying he’s just using me as a booty call, there’s others who say to give him a little time and it’ll work itself out. My emotions are all over the place but I really just want to be held right now, by him, other than this mess I felt like our relationship has been really good so far.

      • web admin

        web admin

        March 7, 2018 at 5:34 pm

        It is possible that he is interested in developing and nourishing a relationship with you. It is possible he is only interested in a physical relationship. He may be confused or uncertain about his feelings. Take this time to determine what you want for your future. Speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, Anxious!

    6. Mia

      January 24, 2018 at 9:02 am

      I had been with my boyfriend for just under two years. Everything was perfect, we planned our future together and were saving for a house. The first year we were together was actually amazing, I wouldn’t change anything about it. He told me to get close to his family so I did. I was his first relationship from when he was 16 and he is now 23. The last year has been rocky, we did spend a lot of time together, however I never stopped him spending time with his mates and doing literally whatever he wanted to. He knew how to wind me up and make me annoyed and then would call me mardy when I reacted to anything. If we would have a disagreement, he would always make it his mission to make me cry and then tell me I was always crying. Things happened within this year to show me that he didn’t fully care about me, however he claimed that he did. He would do things to doubt my trust and then tell me that trust means a lot and I do not trust him. We were still having amazing times though and a lot of the time he treat me perfectly. I was so close to all of his family, his mum and dad always called me their daughter. However, for a while, he didn’t show me as much love as he did anyone else he cared about. I told him that he needs to begin to think about my feelings and start to treat and love me the same. One month ago, we were at a family gathering and he was telling my family the plans about us getting a house in the near future. The next day, there was a situation whereby he showed me he didn’t regard me in a situation. When challenged about this, he dumped me. Over text. Like the last two years meant nothing. I requested to see him in person two days after and he was broken. He was crying hysterically about the decision he made and said he needs ‘time’ and ‘space’ to work out what he wants in the future. He has two jobs and isn’t happy with how either of them are going. He said he wants no contact to sort his head out. Something happened yesterday where he text me and asked me if I was ok. I told him about the situation and asked if he had been thinking and he said yes and he doesn’t want a relationship for now but doesn’t want to rule out a future with me. He said our relationship took up all of his energy. I literally did nothing wrong in it and he could be so horrible at times. He said he doesn’t really care about the people he has hurt in the process of ending the relationship such as me, my family and his family. I don’t even recognise the person he has become and he looks soooo ill. I have deleted him off all social media and have got rid of his number (this is when it happened). However, his mum is contacting me more as we were so close and she wants to meet on a weekly basis and begs me I don’t stop talking to her. She is disgusted with his actions and says he is unrecognisable. He is doing the usual of meeting all of his mates and keeping himself occupied 24/7 and claims to love that right now. No doubt he is probably seeing other girls. I just can’t get over him, what should I do in this situation?! How can he go from having intense feelings one evening and then ending it by text the next day?

      • web admin

        web admin

        January 24, 2018 at 8:16 pm

        He is no longer interested in developing a relationship with you. There is no reason to attempt to establish a relationship with him in the future. Take this time to determine what you want for your relationship with his mother. Speak directly and honestly with her about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Mia!

    7. Mia

      January 24, 2018 at 7:00 am

      I had been with my boyfriend for just under two years. Everything was perfect, we planned our future together and were saving for a house. The first year we were together was actually amazing, I wouldn’t change anything about it. He told me to get close to his family so I did. I was his first relationship from when he was 16 and he is now 23. The last year has been rocky, we did spend a lot of time together, however I never stopped him spending time with his mates and doing literally whatever he wanted to. He knew how to wind me up and make me annoyed and then would call me mardy when I reacted to anything. If we would have a disagreement, he would always make it his mission to make me cry and then tell me I was always crying. Things happened within this year to show me that he didn’t fully care about me, however he claimed that he did. He would do things to doubt my trust and then tell me that trust means a lot and I do not trust him. We were still having amazing times though and a lot of the time he treat me perfectly. I was so close to all of his family, his mum and dad always called me their daughter. However, for a while, he didn’t show me as much love as he did anyone else he cared about. I told him that he needs to begin to think about my feelings and start to treat and love me the same. One month ago, we were at a family gathering and he was telling my family the plans about us getting a house in the near future. The next day, there was a situation whereby he showed me he didn’t regard me in a situation. When challenged about this, he dumped me. Over text. Like the last two years meant nothing. I requested to see him in person two days after and he was broken. He was crying hysterically about the decision he made and said he needs ‘time’ and ‘space’ to work out what he wants in the future. He has two jobs and isn’t happy with how either of them are going. He said he wants no contact to sort his head out. Something happened yesterday where he text me and asked me if I was ok. I told him about the situation and asked if he had been thinking and he said yes and he doesn’t want a relationship for now but doesn’t want to rule out a future with me. He said our relationship took up all of his energy. I literally did nothing wrong in it and he could be so horrible at times. He said he doesn’t really care about the people he has hurt in the process of ending the relationship such as me, my family and his family. I don’t even recognise the person he has become and he looks soooo ill. I have deleted him off all social media and have got rid of his number (this is when it happened). However, his mum is contacting me more as we were so close and she wants to meet on a weekly basis and begs me I don’t stop talking to her. She is disgusted with his actions and says he is unrecognisable. He is doing the usual of meeting all of his mates and keeping himself occupied 24/7 and claims to love that right now. No doubt he is probably seeing other girls. I just can’t get over him, what should I do in this situation?! How can he go from having intense feelings one evening and then ending it by text the next day?

      • web admin

        web admin

        January 24, 2018 at 8:13 pm

        He is no longer interested in developing a relationship with you. There is no reason to attempt to establish a relationship with him in the future. Take this time to determine what you want for your relationship with his mother. Speak directly and honestly with her about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Mia!

    8. pushedhimaway

      January 22, 2018 at 5:46 am

      Hey, my partner and I ended things about two weeks ago. We were eachothers first serious and genuine relationship. We were together for nearly 1year and a half. I miss him like crazy, and I think Ive made a terrible mistake.

      I was so hurt and unsure after the breakup, I knew it was coming, and to be fair it was mutal. But afterwards, I regretted it immediately. But he went cold, straight away. He didnt want to talk, didnt want to see me. It was the morning after and I called him, we spoke for a short while and I told him I regretted the way things ended and that I still loved him. He wouldnt say if back, and I was relentless. I didnt and still don’t understand how he couldnt care.

      I tried my hardest to ignore him the first couple days, but there were a few things we needed to give eachother (family christmas presents ect.) So I messaged him, asking if I could meet up with him and swap our gifts, say a proper goodbye one last time. I know it was a silly thing to hope for, I know I was just tourtuing myself. He said no anyway.

      The thing is, I messaged him a few times after seeing him out with girls, drinking and partying. I asked him if he was happy and he said “Happier than Ive ever been”, I tried to talk to him like normal. Just be mates, because Id rather that than nothing. But he ended up blocking me and deleting me from facebook.

      It shattered myheart, because we were so in love just a few days a go, and now he wanted nothing to do with me.

      When I asked him why we couldnt just be friends, he said he didnt want to be, that it would make him “unhappy”. I know I should have let him go a long time ago, I should have stopped messaging him.

      My question is, do you think I’ve blown it? Do you think he legitimately winces when he sees my name pop up on his phone? Or my name in a conversation? Im so regretful that I messaged him complaining so much, because Ive obviously pushed him away.

      My friends and family and telling me it’s the way boys are. They dont want to know or feel. But reading your article and seeing how adamant you are about only messaging him ONCE, has made me feel totally stupid and pathetic.

      I just miss him, so much. And I dont know what to do.

      • web admin

        web admin

        January 22, 2018 at 9:31 pm

        You have made the decision to break up with him. He has shared his thoughts and feelings with you. He is not interested in developing a relationship with your or nourishing a friendship with you. There is no reason for you to continue to reach out to him. If he reaches out to you in the future, then share your kindness and compassion with him. Have a great day, Pushed!

    9. Amy

      January 19, 2018 at 6:30 pm

      Hi. My boyfriend and I recently broke up. We were together for almost a year, and we fell hard and fast for each other. We didn’t fight until I had to leave for the military for 8 weeks. When I came back we would be hot and cold. We fought almost everyday but we still had good times together. Eventually our relationship started getting rough on the edges. He broke up with me and then go together with me. However during that time he barely talked to me, being distant. I went over to see him not to know that we would have sex, and right before I was about to leave the next morning he broke up with me.

      Its been so hard. And I went be the advice of not being clingy and make it clear about how I feel. I asked him how he was and he said he was better then ever. It’s been two days since we broke up. Will he ever want me back?? Why is it that he wants to be friends with me but treats me like shit at work?
      Please help. I’m hurt and desperate.

      • web admin

        web admin

        January 19, 2018 at 10:01 pm

        Take this time to determine what you want for your future. Decide if his actions are acceptable. Give him another opportunity if you feel safe doing so. Speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, Amy!

    10. Amy

      August 24, 2017 at 12:14 pm

      Please help me. I am really confused. I met my boyfriend 10 months ago, and we fell hard and fast for each other. I was blissfully happy, I thought we were blissfully happy for 3 months, until I left for Christmas. I had family problems, and went home alone. When I got back, he was acting strangely. Then he told me he wanted a two week break to do his taxes and work. I honored that, and we got back together.Then 3 months later, he broke up with me. I let him go,and did no contact for 30 days. He came back, saying his mom didn’t want him to be with me because I am not their religion, but that he loved me and wanted to be with me. I was crushed and felt differently about the relationship after that, but tried to make it work. To secretly “revenge” him, I had a threesome. He does not know about this. I felt awful, and tried to make the relationship work, but kept drinking a lot, became a mess of a person. I became needy with him. He broke up with me again 3 weeks ago.
      In the relationship, he would run hot and cold with me, and he always put himself first.
      However, when things were right, we were both really happy together. I know, and I own my issues in the relationship. I know I need time to work on myself.
      What I am asking is do you think there is hope that he can change, want me again, and make this work if I clean myself up? I have been so depressed, I just miss being with him every day and want us to be happy somehow.
      Please give me your best advice. Thanks.

      • web admin

        web admin

        August 24, 2017 at 7:38 pm

        You have made decisions that will likely cause permanent problems in your already stressful relationship. It is likely that your relationship is not viable for the long term. Allow thoughts of him to fade. Allow the actions and events of this relationship to influence you in the future. Learn these lessons and attempt not to make similar choices in the future. Have a great day, Amy!

    11. Natalie

      August 17, 2017 at 5:23 am

      I just ended things with a guy. I’m sad, and mad that I miss him. But feel slightly better after reading this. In the beginning he seemed absolutely infatuated with me. Our connection was so deep. Over time, he was just always at my place, eating my food, sleeping in late, would use my things and bathroom products….and became cold and distant towards me. I would give him space, trying to be understanding that he may be stressed because he’s leaving for his last year of teachers college.

      We met on an online dating site. I did log on, decided to delete my account and I noticed he was online…still looking. It broke my heart. So, I decides to call and confront him about everything and how he is treating me. He admitted to it all. He said that he does like me a lot and loves spending time with me, a lot. But, felt himself growing distant because things felt as though they were moving into a serious relationship. He said he doesn’t feel comfortable with doing long distance relationships while in school. I did say I have no problem doing the long distance but that I would not push him or try to convince him to do otherwise. I instead ended it, and told him I deserve better treatment. Not to feel desired and wanted one day, and then feel that cold, distant behaviour from him another day.

      He said he still wanted to stay in touch. And that he is thankful for meeting me and that he is at a loss of words at how, kind and patient I am with how he handled things. He shared that he is shocked I’m not hurting, as most girls cry and beg him to stay. I thought that was rather egotistical of him. I said “Not hurt. Disappointed. I didn’t think you were the type that would do this kind of thing, as you were so adamant in ensuring we would have open communication always and be honest with one another. And you were the one mentioning relationship stuff. I never once pressured a relationship. It’s as though you scared yourself off” He just went quiet.

      Needless to say, we hung up gracefully. But, I cried. I do miss the moments. The connection, the affection and intamacy…while it feels like he doesn’t even care.

      • web admin

        web admin

        August 17, 2017 at 6:58 pm

        This relationship has ended. It is highly beneficial that you have learned many lessons with this relationship. Allow this dream to influence your future relationships and decisions that you make in those relationships. Allow your thoughts of him to fade at this time. Look inward and determine what you want for your future. New opportunities will arrive. Have a great day, Natalie!

      • Gina

        September 7, 2017 at 2:16 pm

        The keywords was when he told you he’s done this to other women and how all of them . He’s a jerk. End of story.

        • web admin

          web admin

          September 8, 2017 at 8:38 pm

          Thank you for sharing your insights. You are correct. It would be best to end any abusive relationships. Have a great day, Gina!

    12. Jay jay

      July 31, 2017 at 9:30 am

      Hi. I just broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years last night. I am devastated. We’ve been through a lot. We’ve fought together. I’ve always been faithful to him. I still feel that I love him. We’ve been doing long distance and things were ok. Until he mentioned that if I found out about his bucket list I’d definitely dump him. I did get upset and told him that it really arouse a lot of suspicion in me but he calmly settled it and we were happy again. Last month he completely ignored me. He didn’t text back or call me.I have anxiety and I’ve been battling depression for sometime. He’s been helping me go through it. Last night he just said to me move on because I already did.
      I felt something stab me inside. I was so hurt because I thought he cared about me. I know he’s seeing someone else now but all I’ve done for him just went like that. It’s day one since he dumped me and I’m crying so much. I’m trying so hard to hold myself together. I keep seeing him in everything. I feel like its just yesterday when we both fell for each other. I’m deeply hurt. And especially with my depression problem it’s worse. At times I get the urge to harm myself that way I wouldn’t feel a thing. I still love him. I’m still in love with him. He said that he couldn’t do it anymore cause the distance was hard for him and that he still loves me and won’t forget me but that still wounded me. I’m completely lost. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where to start. I hate my life. I hate myself.

      • web admin

        web admin

        July 31, 2017 at 2:05 pm

        It sounds as though you made the right decision. You ended a relationship that did not bring you happiness. You are making positive decisions in your life. There are people who will enter your life who will bring negative emotions. Allow this relationship to be a lesson for you future relationships. Do not bring harm to yourself, as that will not bring you benefit at this time or in the future. Take this time to become closer to your family and friends. Have a great day, Jay!

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