How to Get a Boyfriend in Middle School

By on April 1, 2015

Alright girls, so you are hoping to figure out how to get a boyfriend in middle school. Often some of the things we do can actually scare guys away so we are going to talk about those things. Luckily, it’s not that hard and if you just relaxed and focus on being a good person, the right guy will come along when he’s supposed to.

 

Don’t Smother Him

The number one thing you should never do is smother a guy. You shouldn’t talk to him every time you see him and you shouldn’t call or text him all the time. If you’re interested in him that’s great but if you become obsessed with him, he will not want to hang out with you. Guys are attracted to girls who don’t need them to be happy. Girls who have strong friendships, are involved in school activities and do their best at everything are more likely to attract a nice boy.

 

Have Your Own Interests

Don’t think about him all the time, make time to focus on your favorite activities and to hang out with your friends. If he sees that you are good at things, he will be impressed. If he sees that people like you because you’re really nice and fun to hang out with, he will want to hang out with you too. Don’t try to be make trouble in class or skip class to impress him. You don’t have to break the rules to get a nice guy to like you. If any guy tries to encourage you to do something against the rules, he’s probably not going to do well in school and he might not be that nice to you either.

 

Work On Building Your Friendships

If you really know how to be a good friend and have strong friendships, he will notice that quality and feel comfortable with you. If you don’t make an effort to be friends with people, he probably won’t want to be friends with you. We have to make an effort to be nice to people and treat them with kindness in order for people to also be kind to us.

 

Get To Know Him and Be Patient

Even if you think you like a guy, just get to know him better to see if you actually have some things in common. You may spend some time together with his friends and realize they are all jerks and you don’t feel comfortable with how they choose to spend their time. You want a boyfriend that is considerate and will try to be a good person. It’s important that you don’t rush getting a boyfriend so you don’t end up dating a dud.

 

Have A Fun Sense of Style

Make an effort to be stylish and comfortable so your natural beauty is highlighted. Guys love girls that smell nice and take pride in being put together. Again, don’t be desperate and wear really revealing clothing because the good guys don’t go for that look. They want a girl who is confident, smart and kind.

 

Chat With Him After Class

If you like a guy you shouldn’t ignore him completely. Just be friendly and sometimes (not all the time) chat with him after class. You don’t have to tell him you like him, just ask him how his day is going and how his classes are going. Try not to always talk about school work because we know that can be very boring.

 

Find Someone That Likes What You Like

middle school boyfriend

If you want to find a boyfriend, you should see which guys like the things that you’re into. If you love student government maybe you will find another guy in your class that does too. Think about it, if you’re in the band and always going to band practice, it will be easy to talk to him and hang out with him and you could help each other practice too.

 

Don’t Like The Guy That All The Girls Like

Here’s some advice to keep you from getting frustrated when you want to get a boyfriend. Don’t like the guy that all the other girls like. Often the guys that get all the attention end up with a big head and get so used to that attention that they end up just flirting with everyone. It’s not fun to date a guy that flirts with everyone.

 

Smile And Say Hi When You See Him

If there is a certain guy you have a crush on you can get him to notice you by smiling at him. It’s a very simple way to see if he likes you back and maybe once he starts to notice you more, he will start to like you. Sometimes boys are distracted but when you get their attention, they might realize how nice you are. Remember, if he doesn’t seem to notice you, don’t worry there are plenty of other guys out there that will appreciate you. Don’t hold onto the idea of dating someone too firmly because it will only make you unhappy if you sit around wishing he likes you back.

 

Exchange Numbers

Exchange numbers so you can get to know each other. You can text each other and talk on the phone but let him reach out to you sometimes too so you know that he likes you. If you’re the one always reaching out to him, he might not like you back. Also don’t call or text him late at night because you want to be respectful when he’s sleeping. If he’s not responding to you, he may not be interested so don’t keep calling. Also try to keep the conversations positive and don’t complain about things. Ask him how he is doing and encourage him. Maybe find some way you can help him with something but never gossip.

 

Always Speak Kindly About Others

It’s really important that you keep your words about others positive when you speak to your friends and to your crush. If people know that you are a gossiper it makes you look bad and can ruin your reputation.

 

Try To Be Happy and Fun

The more positive you can be, the more guys will want to be around you. If you can always have a smile and always have something nice to say about someone else, people will really enjoy your company. We can always choose to have a great day and help others keep smiling by being nice to them. Guys will notice how nice you are and you’re more likely to find a nice guy if you act like this.

 

Be Nice To Everyone and Don’t Just Think About Yourself

Thinking of other people helps others know that you are going to look out for them and helps them trust that you’re really a good person. Try to get involved with community service or volunteer and people will respect you. When you see someone struggling with their homework, don’t make fun of them, see if you can help them. Don’t be a know it all but just offer your kindness whenever you can. It’s just human nature that guys will like nice people and the more we show that we are a good person through our actions, the better our chances of attracting a high quality guy are.

 

Participate In Class

If you focus on your schoolwork and get good grades, a nice guy will like that you are smart. Girls that don’t pay attention in class and don’t care about their schoolwork aren’t really that impressive to guys. Remember if a guy only likes you because he thinks your pretty, the relationship will only be superficial but if he likes you because of who you are, it’s more likely to be a great bond.

 

Always Do Your Best

When we always put our best foot forward whether it’s in sports, art or math class, we show that we really care about doing our best. Putting in effort, even if we aren’t that good at things is a great quality to have. Don’t worry about what other people think of you, just know that you’re doing your best. A nice guy will notice if you go above and beyond in your school projects or work hard to be the best athlete so don’t be afraid to shine!

 

See If He Likes You Back

If you’re getting the feeling that he likes you, you’ll probably know. If he flirts with all the girls, don’t be fooled and think that he likes you. If he is different around you than around the other girls and goes out of his way to talk to you, chances are he likes you. Give him an opportunity to tell you by talking to him after school or going to a sports game together. You don’t ever have to force yourself to tell him you like it, just let it happen naturally and don’t worry about it. You’re in no rush!

 

Make Sure He Treats You Respectfully

If he says he’s going to call you but always forgets, that’s not very respectful. If he makes fun of you or is rude to you, don’t waste your time trying to get him to like you. Wait until there is a nice guy who you like and work on getting to know him. The boys that like to break the rules and show off usually don’t know how to treat girls well at all and they are immature and just want attention.

Just be confident in yourself and know that the right guy will come along. Don’t try to force anything and keep up with your friends because they will usually last longer than a boyfriend does anyway!

94 Comments

  1. Avatar

    diamond

    May 8, 2019 at 4:40 pm

    i like this boy and im going to ask him out but every time i try to im scared and his friend told him that i was going to and i have a big feeling that he likes me

    • web admin

      web admin

      May 9, 2019 at 3:08 pm

      You feel as though your crush is interested in developing a relationship with you. Since you have this feelings, you should speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Nourish this relationship by spending additional time with him in person. Have a great day, Diamond!

  2. Avatar

    Dolly

    March 18, 2019 at 7:51 pm

    I am in 7th grade and I cannot get anyone to ask me out. I don’t want to ask them out but no one is interested in me and I don’t know what to do. I am the goody goody so I think that is why no one will ask me out I have a few boys that I think like me but other than that, no one will ask me out. Please help me!!

    • web admin

      web admin

      March 19, 2019 at 9:51 pm

      It is possible that there are people who interested in nourishing a relationship with you, but they are uncertain about your thoughts and feelings. If there is someone that you want to maintain a relationship with, then nourish your relationship with them by spending additional time with them in person. If there is someone that has given you reason to believe that they are interested in you, then speak with that person about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Dolly!

  3. Avatar

    Sophie

    March 17, 2019 at 7:59 pm

    I am in 7th grade and I like this 8th grader, I don’t know what to do because I think one of his friends like me but I don’t know if he likes me. I only have one class with him but I see him in the halls a lot. No one will ask me out and I don’t think he has the nerves to ask me out. I don’t want to ask anyone out. My friends have caught on to the chemistry and they don’t know what to do. I just need help on what to do.

    • web admin

      web admin

      March 17, 2019 at 10:21 pm

      Your friends are aware of the chemistry in this relationship. This likely means that your crush may be interested in maintaining a relationship with you as well. Determine what you want for your future. Nourish this relationship by spending additional time with him in person. If you are uncertain about how to speak with him, then work to attract him to you. He may want to reach out to you first if he feels that you want him to nourish a relationship with you. Have a great day, Sophie!

  4. Avatar

    Sara

    March 12, 2019 at 10:56 pm

    Hey. I’m sara and I’ve liked this boy since 6th grade. I go to a really small private school and there are only five of us in 8th grade. We all know everything about each other and treat each other like siblings. I wanna tell him that I like him. But our school is really small and everyone knows everything. I need help!

    • web admin

      web admin

      March 13, 2019 at 12:28 pm

      It is likely that the people in your class are aware of your feelings for your friend. It is likely that the two of you share a strong social connection. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Nourish this relationship by spending additional time with him in person. Have a great day, Sara!

  5. Avatar

    Bella

    February 23, 2019 at 7:31 pm

    Hi my name is Bella, I am in 7th grade and I like this 8th grader. He always is flirting with me, I don’t know what to do next. I just don’t want it to get weird because our moms are friends and have been for a long time. I really like him but don’t know what to do next. Thanks, Bella.

    • web admin

      web admin

      February 23, 2019 at 10:25 pm

      The two of you share a strong social and emotional relationship. It is possible that he is interested in developing a relationship with you as well. Nourish this relationship by spending additional time with him. It is likely that your parents will support your relationship. Determine what you want for the future of your relationship. If you think it is appropriate, then speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Bella!

  6. Avatar

    Kaya

    February 11, 2019 at 9:45 am

    So I’m in 7th grade and I really like this boy. I go to a homeschooling group on Wednesdays aND I’m a Christian so he is really sweet. We only have one class together and then he goes home… what should I do??

    • web admin

      web admin

      February 11, 2019 at 7:12 pm

      The two of you are both home schooled and have similar religious influences in your lives. It is possible that he has similar feelings for you as well. After your class, you may want to attempt to speak with him. It is likely that his and your parents will approve the two of you spending time with each other. Have a great day, Kaya!

  7. Avatar

    Clara

    February 4, 2019 at 4:25 pm

    Okay so in being near I’m in 7th grade I dated this guy and I broke up while I didn’t break up with him he broke up with me and he had somebody else break up with me it’s a huge long incident I call it the you know I’m not even your say what it is but I broke up with him and ever since none no guys have been interested in me or like I don’t know if they’re interested mean people like oh used to be so cute together what should I do if there’s this guy that I like I said I liked him in the past but don’t even know if he likes me now but I still like him I’ve liked him for like a month to 3 and around Christmas and I just really want to get him as my boyfriend but I don’t think he wants any hasn’t dated anyone for4 3 years I don’t know but if you can help me please

    • web admin

      web admin

      February 5, 2019 at 10:26 am

      It seems as though you have recently ended a relationship, and you are currently interested in developing a new relationship. Determine what you want for your future. If there is someone specific that you want to nourish a relationship with, then spend additional time with that person. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings, and give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, Clara!

    • Avatar

      Annie

      February 24, 2019 at 9:00 pm

      I get it. My boyfriend and I had dated for two years and then he started flirting with other girls and wouldn’t talk to me. We broke up and ever since no one has asked me out in two years. If you really like him start giving him hints. Just be patient, and if he doesn’t do anything you could just be straight forward and tell him how you feel and ask him if he feels the same.

      • web admin

        web admin

        February 25, 2019 at 8:32 pm

        Thank you for sharing your insights and experiences. It is always beneficial when members of our community share their supportive comments. Please share more of your thoughts and feelings in the future. Have a great day, Annie!

      • Avatar

        Lexi

        March 17, 2019 at 7:54 pm

        That is what happened to me, exactly.

        • web admin

          web admin

          March 17, 2019 at 10:18 pm

          Thank you for sharing your supportive comment. Please share more of your thoughts and feelings in the future. Have a great day, Lexi!

  8. Avatar

    Kate

    February 3, 2019 at 8:29 am

    Hi my name is Kate and I am in 7th grade. I have a crush on this one boy, he is always at my locker and flirting with me but my elementary crush/ ex boyfriend that I dated for almost three years has started flirting with me too. Me and my ex broke up because we needed a break but he hasn’t dated anyone since we broke up. When we were dating everyone thought we would marry each other, and it was like they really broke up. So my question is which guy should I pick? Thanks – Kate

    • web admin

      web admin

      February 4, 2019 at 12:02 pm

      You have a relationship with your ex and with your new crush. Determine what you value in a partner. Ensure that kindness and compassion are the most important things that you value for a relationship. Decide who you share more hobbies and interests with. There are many things that you should look at for your future partner. Make a decision and speak with that person about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Kate!

  9. Avatar

    Kate

    February 3, 2019 at 7:58 am

    Hi my name is Kate and I am in 7th grade. I have a crush on this one boy, he is always at my locker and flirting with me but my elementary crush/ ex boyfriend is flirting me too. We just needed a break because we dated for almost three years and ever since we broke up he has not dated anyone. My question is which boy should I choose? Thanks – Kate

    • web admin

      web admin

      February 4, 2019 at 11:53 am

      You have a relationship with your ex and with your new crush. Determine what you value in a partner. Ensure that kindness and compassion are the most important things that you value for a relationship. Decide who you share more hobbies and interests with. There are many things that you should look at for your future partner. Make a decision and speak with that person about your thoughts and feelings. Have a great day, Kate!

  10. Avatar

    Emma Chavers

    January 1, 2019 at 7:38 pm

    Hey. I like this boy that has another girlfriend. Can you help me? What should I do?

    • web admin

      web admin

      January 1, 2019 at 8:08 pm

      He has a girlfriend. Do not attempt to nourish a romantic relationship. There is no benefit to be gained in attempting to harm his relationship and partner. Focus your emotional energy elsewhere. Ensure that you continue to share your kindness and compassion at all times. Have a great day, Emma!

  11. Avatar

    Sarah

    December 17, 2018 at 12:37 pm

    I get super confused about weather this boy in my class likes me. Let’s start with the basics first though. He’s that 7th grade boy that is friends with everyone but in my class he mostly hangs out with this group of girls. I find he treats me differently than the others. Ex: he complements me randomly about my school work and even once about my hair. There is also the occasional eye contact and teasing. He also talks to me about different/ more important things than when he is with his group of girls. His family is also quite familiar with mine since we’ve known each other since kindergarten. I’m not really sure what I’m asking though.

    • web admin

      web admin

      December 17, 2018 at 6:50 pm

      The two of you share a strong social connection. His behaviors may be indications that he is interested in nourishing a relationship with you. Determine what you want for your future. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Strengthen your relationship by spending additional with him in person. Have a great day, Sarah!

  12. Avatar

    Sarah

    December 17, 2018 at 12:16 pm

    I’m not really sure how to say this but I have a crush on a funny and nice boy in my grade(7).I hang out with his female friends during school, and everyone in his class are pretty close so he is usually with the girls and the other guys on the group. We make eye contact sometimes and we both play hockey but I don’t really know what to do. I’m trying to follow the rule of getting to know him better and becoming friends, so I guess what I really want to know is how do I tell if he has an interest in me?

    • web admin

      web admin

      December 17, 2018 at 6:49 pm

      The two of you share a strong social connection. His behaviors may be indications that he is interested in nourishing a relationship with you. Determine what you want for your future. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Strengthen your relationship by spending additional with him in person. Have a great day, Sarah!

  13. Avatar

    Camila

    October 5, 2018 at 3:41 pm

    Well this one boy .I like him and i told my boy bestfriend and he told him now he keeps looking at me but we dont really talk. We use to but not no more what should i do? I need your guys help😭

    • web admin

      web admin

      October 6, 2018 at 10:57 am

      He is aware of your feelings. There may be a variety of influences in his life which are causing his behaviors. Take this time to determine what you want for your future. Strengthen your relationship by spending additional time with him in person, as this will strengthen your relationship. Have a great day, Camila!

    • Avatar

      Marie

      October 9, 2018 at 7:31 pm

      Just try to talk to him about something you know he likes or something yall have in common.

      • web admin

        web admin

        October 10, 2018 at 9:33 pm

        Thank you for sharing your supportive comment. Please share more of your thoughts and feelings in the future. It is certain that your words will support many members of our community. Have a great day, Marie!

    • Avatar

      Audrey Rose

      October 10, 2018 at 5:13 pm

      Same as Camila

  14. Avatar

    Jenny

    August 20, 2018 at 1:00 am

    I don’t have a crush on anyone but I really want a boyfriend. The problem is that I’m really weird and boys think of me as a class clown. Everytime I get a crush he’s either in a relationship, gay, or just thinks i’m a weirdo.

    • web admin

      web admin

      August 20, 2018 at 10:46 pm

      Your humor and personality will serve you well in your future relationships. There is no reason to rush into a relationship at this time. Ensure that you strengthen your current relationships. If you want to develop a new social relationship, then spend additional time with that person. Determine what you want for your future and take appropriate action. Have a great day, Jenny!

  15. Avatar

    Stacie

    May 9, 2018 at 3:36 am

    Hi I’m Stacie and I have a crush on this one boy and I think he likes me back but how can I find out if he likes me or not. We are good friends too. Thanks for everything – Stacie♥️

    • web admin

      web admin

      May 9, 2018 at 11:51 pm

      The two of you are good friends and likely share a strong social and emotional connection. It is possible that he is interested in nourishing a relationship with you. Determine what you want for your future. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings. You may find that your relationship will strengthen as you spend additional time with him. Have a great day, Stacie!

  16. Avatar

    milly

    April 15, 2018 at 9:58 am

    well I have a crush on one of the popular guys sometimes he might like me and say hes going to ask me out and I get exited and give my hopes up cause he is always dating one of my friends

    • web admin

      web admin

      April 15, 2018 at 11:11 pm

      It is possible that he feels a strong emotional connection with you. If he is in a relationship with your friend, then allow thoughts of him to fade. Do not attempt to develop a relationship with him at this time. If his relationship naturally ends and he reaches out to you, then share your thoughts and feelings with him. Determine what you want for your future at this time. Have a great day, Milly!

  17. Avatar

    Lily

    April 6, 2018 at 11:40 am

    Hey, I am in 7th grade and I have had a crush a particular boy since 5th grade we got to school together occasionally talk, exchange looks, and he always smiles when he looks at me. But i can’t get him to ask me out. i trying to figure out if its time to move on. what should i do?

    • web admin

      web admin

      April 6, 2018 at 8:45 pm

      It is possible that he feels an emotional connection with you. The two of you share a social connection. Determine what you want for your future. Speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. Give him an opportunity to share himself with you as well. Have a great day, Lily!

  18. Avatar

    Annika

    March 13, 2018 at 9:44 pm

    Hi, I’m Annika. I am in the 7th grade and I have a bad crush on one of my best friends. When I’m around her I feel…different. So I need so your guy’s advice. Could you help me out?

    • web admin

      web admin

      March 14, 2018 at 9:11 pm

      It is certainly clear that you feel a strong emotional connection with your best friend. It is possible that she is interested in nourishing a relationship with you. Take this time to determine what you want for your future. Speak directly and honestly with her about your thoughts and feelings. Give her an opportunity to share herself with you as well. Have a great day, Annika!

  19. Avatar

    Michele

    February 5, 2018 at 10:24 am

    Hey! I’m in middle school (7th grade) And I have a crush on this boy and its super sad. I saw him on a jog the other day and he looks no older then 9th grade but I have no info on him (name,school etc) and there is no way he goes to my school because its very small and I would notice him. I haven’t given up on finding out stuff about him but I feel like I should give up soon. How do you get over a crush? And it was special. He was like an inch away from me and for a second all I could see was his (gorgeous) face. What do I do?

    • web admin

      web admin

      February 6, 2018 at 11:02 pm

      Take this time to determine what you want for your future. Determine if this relationship is viable at this time. If you want to develop a relationship with him, then speak directly and honestly with him about your thoughts and feelings. If not, then allow thoughts of him to influence you to treat everyone in your life with kindness and compassion. Have a great day, Michele!

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