40 Questions for Couples

By on October 3, 2014

When you first meet your date, you want to look your best. Questions about important topic, embarrassing matters or controversial subjects may be avoided so that the date goes well. Unfortunately, this can set you up for failure in the future. As the relationship progresses, you will end up discovering things about each other that you never hoped to find out.


Instead of suddenly discovering something unpleasant during an argument or following moving in together, you should ask these questions in advance. Each question helps you to learn more about your other half and what they think. Likewise, it prevents your relationship from becoming boring or stagnant.


1. How often do you think we should have sex?

passion lovers

Although most men will just tell you “more”, you can temper his answer down to an actual. By finding out his expectations, you can prevent disagreements in the bedroom from occurring.


2. Is there anything about me that I should change?


If you plan on asking this question, you should also be prepared to hear the answer.


3. What is the first thing you notice when you first see a woman?

first met

This offers a hint of what originally interested him in you—or the specific assets that you should highlight when you get dressed.


4. Have you ever snooped on my phone or computer?


Before it goes any farther, you need to know if you can trust him. Just keep in mind that trust is shared. If you are snooping on him, it is unfair to expect him not to look through your personal e-mails.


5. Which days do you think we had the best sex?

Ask him to tell you five of his favorite sexual experiences with you. Figure out what they have in common and recreate the heat!


6. How do you describe me to others?

meet friends

This is an excellent way to see what he really thinks of you.


7. Do you believe that making love and having sex are different?


If he thinks that these are the same things, it could explain a lot about his approach to having sex.


8. What is your most embarrassing moment?


Make sure to emphasize the word “most”. When you first started dating, he may have been uncomfortable telling you his most awkward secrets. Now, he should be better prepared to open up.


9. If we had never met each other, what do you think you would be doing today?

This can be illuminating about what he wants in life, or it could also indicate that he already considers what he would be doing without you.


10. Do you think physical looks are the most important factor in creating a healthy relationship?


Find out if he believes that love, looks or friendship matter more for the creation of a relationship.


11. Do you ever masturbate?

This can be fairly illuminating. It is an often ignored aspect of a relationship, but a topic that will be broached at some point.


12. Do you ever think about something else during sex?

Although there may be questions that you feel awkward about asking, it can be a worthwhile thing to do.


13. Was there anything that you were particularly worried about on the first time that we had sex?

Although it is fairly normal to worry about a new person seeing you naked, other fears or thoughts may be unusual.


14. What is your favorite thing to do with me sexually?

If you want him to have a good experience in bed over the duration of your relationship, you should find out what turns him on the most.


15. How old were you for your first kiss or to have sex?


Some people mature at an extremely young age. Learning how he old he was for these major life events indicates the type of childhood he had and his values.


16. Tell me a sexual fantasy about us that you have never mentioned before.

Sex may not be the only thing in your relationship, but it can be a fairly important aspect of it.


17. What is the most erotic thing that we can do in bed together?

Like question number 16, this question helps you to figure out better ways to enjoy your time in bed and also ensures that you both are on the same page sexually.


18. If you caught your friend cheating on their wife, would you tell their wife?

This is an extremely important question because it reveals his attitude toward cheating and his personal boundaries.


19. What is the most awkward moment that you have ever had?

Even if you two were meant for each other, it is still possibly for minor stories from your life to be forgotten. Asking questions like this ensures that you share most or all of your stories.


20. How old were you the first time that you thought you were in love?


Once your relationship has progressed, it is possible to talk about early loves or high school girlfriends without feeling envious.


21. Would you ever go to a nude beach with me? Would it bother you if other people at the beach saw me naked?


This is actually a fairly good way to see how comfortable your partner is in his own skin and his personal boundaries. Is he jealous about other people seeing you? Or awkward about undressing? This is an excellent way to find out for sure.


22. Would you rather vacation in a beach-side hammock or in an Arctic igloo?

This is an excellent question to find out if he is an adventurer or a lover of comfortable surroundings.


23. Can you read my mind?

read minds

This is a fun question to periodically ask. As you grow closer as a couple, it will become far easier for him to guess what you are thinking and essentially read your mind.


24. Can you tell me one behavior that I have that really bothers you?

Before you ask this question, make sure that you are prepared for the answer. Although you need to know what behaviors need to be changed, you have to prevent yourself from becoming too defensive.


25. Do you want to buy a sex toy?

Come right out and ask him point blank if he wants to buy any sex toys to use with you. Some guys feel uncomfortable asking, but it asking is the only way to take that first step towards a better sex life.


26. What can we do to grow closer as a couple?

grow together

To stay on track, both partners need to regularly consider their contribution to the relationship and how things can be improved. It takes both people to make a strong relationship.


27. Why do you think some partners cheat?

10 Signs Your Boyfriend is Cheating

Finding out his answer gives you a clue about reasons why he would personally cheat. This can be illuminating for both partners and can provide a specific situation that you can actually prevent.


28. Would you ever want to get a dog or a cat with me?


Before you start talking about children or buying a house, you should consider starting out with a pet. Having a shared responsibility of any sort can bring a great deal of additional stress. By beginning with a dog or cat, you can sort out shared responsibilities, costs and expectations in a type of practice round before moving on to the real thing.


29. Has anyone that you loved ever passed away?


At some point, questions like this can help you to bond over lost loved ones and can help you learn more about his past.


30. Do you plan on getting married someday?


At some point, this question needs to come up.


31. Do your parents’ have a strong marriage? Do you plan on having a relationship like their relationship?

The answers to these questions can be illuminating.


32. Do you believe in God?

believe in god

Religious or faith differences can end up driving a wedge into a relationship that was previously strong. Before things get too serious, make sure to ask important questions about his faith or lack thereof.


33. What are some of your sexual fantasies that involve me?

You can’t make his dreams come true unless you know them!


34. What types of animals do you like? Have you ever owned a pet?


Bonding over dreams of zoology careers and memories of childhood geckos can help improve the strength of your relationship.


35. Who helped you become person that you are today? Who are some of your role models?

By learning who your boyfriend aspires to be, you can help him along the way. Discovering his role models also reveals key information about his personality.


36. If money was not a problem, what would you do with the rest of your life?


When it comes to things that you are passionate about, money can get in the way of achieving your dreams. Find out what he wishes that he could do and learn what he is most passionate about.


37. Have you ever been in a fight?


One quality of long term, successful relationships tends to be the habit of sharing information about childhood experiences.


38. What is your favorite subject to study?

If some of your favorite subjects are the same, you could end up having a date night cooking class or even create a book together. Learning about your shared passions is an opportunity for you to transform your date night into something unique.


39. What would you do after winning the lottery?


Some people choose to retire while others would want to travel the world. Asking this question helps you find out what he most values.


40. Do you believe in love at first sight?


It may be a corny question to ask, but it can be revealing. Does your partner believe in the concept of soul mates and true love? Find out for yourself by asking him.

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