10 Signs Your Boyfriend Is Controlling

By on October 8, 2013

Many girls find themselves in controlling relationships, where their boyfriend is very dominate about everything and it causes a lot of problems and takes impact on the girls involved in horrendous ways. Some get out of these relationships and some get stuck with controlling guys for years to come- or even for life. It is very important for every girl out there to know the signs of a controlling boyfriend and to know that being with a guy like this isn’t good for them or anyone else. To help, here are 10 signs to let you know if your boyfriend is controlling:


Sign #1.) He Doesn’t Want You To Go Out.


A controlling boyfriend usually hates to see his girlfriend go out without him. If your boyfriend is the controlling-type he won’t want to let you go out with certain friends, family and he may even throw a fit every time you do. Controlling men will try to keep a girl all to themselves. A lot of the time, women who have been in bad relationships like this, will say that they lost a lot of relationships with other people they were close to because of how their boyfriends were.

Sign #2.) You Are Always Paying or He Never Lets You Handle The Money.


When it comes down to it, a boyfriend who wants to be in control, will want to be in control of the finances. This could either mean he wants to pay for everything, tell you how you can and can’t spend your money or he will only make you pay for the things you both want and need. He will still tell you what to do with your money, become strict about what’s yours, but he won’t set any restrictions on his. It could really go either way.

Sign #3.) He Will Pick Your Friends.


Just like he won’t like you going out, he won’t like you talking to, seeing or being around certain people. A controlling boyfriend may try to skim down your friends, and even family, or try to eliminate them from your life altogether. Yet, when it comes down to the people you would rather not see him around, he won’t change who he talks to or who he hangs out with. He won’t be concerned with how you feel, only his opinion on your personal life will matter to him.

Sign #4.) He’s Really, Really, Really Nosy.


Control-freak warning sign: He will always be snooping in your stuff. Whether it is your social networking site, your voice mail, your texts or your mail- He will always need to know what is going on with your life, money, friends, conversations and pretty much anything else you can think of. For a controlling boyfriend, there are absolutely no boundaries or privacy. While he is all up in your business, he may get very angry when you snoop around in his stuff and tell you that is not okay, even though it is okay for him to do it to you.

Sign #5.) He Blames You For Everything.


Does your boyfriend blame everything on you? Even all of the things that are actually his fault? Does he get mad at you for stupid things that weren’t your fault? You may have a boyfriend who is controlling, if you said yes to those. A man who has that characteristic will blame everything on you and you may never hear an apology. Instead, no matter who holds the fault, he will wait for you to apologize to him, even if it wasn’t a big deal or your fault. He likes to have that control of your emotions and likes to have you feel the regret in the end.

Sign #6.) He Is Involved In All Of Your Decisions.

Couple Fighting at School

Of course, in a relationship, it is best to make important decisions together. But, when it comes down to it, if need be or if the decision isn’t all that vital, you should be able to make a decision on your own. If you find yourself feeling like you can’t ever make any decision without him, he may be controlling. He will have installed that thought into you and made it so you are dependent on him.

Sign #7.) He Puts You Down.


Verbal abuse is a very strong sign of a controlled relationship. A boyfriend who is controlling will put you down to control you better, make you think untrue things about yourself and then he will come back to bring you back up again, so he is the one who makes you feel good (though he was the one to make you feel badly in the first place.) He may also verbally abuse you to get you to do things he wants you to do. The lower your self-esteem, the more vulnerable you become- That’s what controlling guys like.

Sign #8.) He Hurts You.


Besides verbal abuse, a controlling man may physically abuse his partner. Installing fear into someone with abuse (physical or verbal) will make him feel in control and again, make you feel vulnerable. If you are in a relationship that deals with either verbal or physical abuse, please realize you are in a controlled relationship and don’t hesitate to get out. You can do better, no matter what you’ve been told or who you are. Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1−800−799−7233 for help.

Sign #9.) You Start Feeling Suffocated.


This is a common sign that you are being controlled by your boyfriend. If you feel like you’ve lost your freedom, you are always catering to him and he is not returning the favors, then he may be controlling.

Sign #10.) He Says No.


If he says no when you didn’t even ask him, he may be a controlling boyfriend. You shouldn’t have to ask your boyfriend whether you can or can’t do something, what you can and can’t buy with your own money, every single person you hang out with or where and where you can’t go. He does not have the right to dictate every part of your life. You may tell him you are going to go get a new pair or jeans and he says you can’t, even though you didn’t ask. Or you may want to visit your family for the day and he says you aren’t allowed to go. That is a controlling boyfriend.


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