How Long Does it Take to Fall in Love

By on September 21, 2015






Love is a magical thing, isn’t? And by magical I mean incredibly confusing yet incredibly beautiful at the same time. Yes, it’s true love can drive us crazy. And one of the undying questions regarding love is, of course, how LONG does it take to fall in love?

Well, first things first: I hate to break it to you ladies, but there’s no possible way you’re in love with the guy (or ‘prince charming’, as you so carelessly refer to him as) you met 2 months ago and started dating shortly after. Love takes time, whether you want to admit it and believe it or not. I understand: in the beginning of a new relationship everything is incredibly lovely and you have butterflies invading your stomach 24/7 and the connection is new and fresh; but are you in LOVE with him, or just enjoying his company? Do you really KNOW this person enough to give your heart away?

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So, it takes time to fall in love. How much time?
There’s really no telling how MUCH time it takes to fall in love with someone. After all, it’s going to be different for every person out there; which only adds to the utter confusion. But one thing is for sure: it’s going to be a very, very long time; and I’m not talking about a few months or even a year.

You Need to Know Your Partner Fully
You see, in order to truly love someone you need to know them for who they TRULY are. And I certainly doubt you’ve come to find out every hidden secret and detail about your partner if you’ve been dating less than a year. You need to see their flaws, know their quirks, and even find out the things that annoy you before you can truly know someone. You need to know their past, be a part of their present, and help them to their future.

You Need to Go Through Fights
Did you know that a lot of couples won’t fight for months? Maybe a little lovers tiff here and there, but nothing that would cause heartbreak or hurt. Well, when it comes time for one of these big fights, the couple doesn’t know how to handle it and they end up breaking up. If you and your partner have been through one (or many) of these quarrels and still hold on to each other, it’s a pretty big sign that you’re in love.

See Through Changes
People and life will change. Whether it happens 3 months or 3 years into the relationship. Something will happen in your life that completely changes everything, for instance a new job in a new country or a devastating incident that leaves you handicapped. And as people, we are constantly transforming and changing in looks and personality. Have you seen your partner through an incredibly change or life event? Have you seen your partner completely change and transform before your eyes? Have you loved them through all of these changes, and your feelings never changed a bit? When you’re in love, you accept someone to the fullest. If you do this, then I’d say you’re in love.

Do they make you FEEL?
When you’re really in love with someone, they will make you feel everything from special to loved to hurt to upset and every little emotion in between. Why? Because their opinion matters, and what they say has a big impact on you. And that’s another reason why love takes time.
A new relationship will be filled with flowers, daisies, flirting, and romantic date nights every other day; and that’s perfectly normal. But there’s more to love then just sitting on a rainbow eating gold with your partner. As time goes on, you’ll notice other feelings that your partner provokes. And when that individual has such a hold on your emotions, it’s love.

Let’s Break it Down.
Love takes time. You need to get to know someone to the fullest before you can even begin to have actual feelings of love for them. You need to be able to accept this individual for who they are, no matter what changes or transformations may occur. They should make you feel happy, but also provoke other feelings as well. How long will this take? A very, very long time. Don’t confuse love for lust, need, or want!

How long did it take you to fall in love?

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12 Comments

  1. Brooke

    May 13, 2017 at 4:38 pm

    Can you love someone but not be ‘in love’ with them? I feel like in a way you love everyone you care about, but being in love with someone is something else. Does it really only take a few months to fall in love? I’m just wondering coz after just under a year of dating this one person I’m still not ‘in love’ with them, but I still care very much about them (so I do say to them I love them). Is it fair to keep going on with the relationship to see how it goes, and maybe at some point I will fall in love with them? Or is it something I should just talk to my partner about?

    • web admin

      web admin

      May 14, 2017 at 9:31 am

      There are many types of love, so it is certainly possible to love someone and not be in love with them. It takes everyone a different amount of time to fall in love–some people fall in love immediately, and other people can take months to know if they are in love. If you do not think that you are in love with your partner after a year though, you may never really feel that passion. What you do depends entirely on you though. Can you see a future in this relationship if you never love them more? Do you think it is fair to your partner? Before you talk to your partner or do anything about it, think carefully about what you want to do first.

  2. Elizabete

    November 9, 2016 at 2:10 pm

    I have just started college and I have never had a relationship before that, one week in I had started feelings for this guy LJ, it just sort of happened after we just were talking about stuff and I didn’t do anithing about it, I could call it a crush. Two weeks later I had more friends but I was more hanging out with this guy Dom, long story short we started dating we where dating for about 3 weeks or so but I never realised that I still had feelings for LJ, my feelings towards Dom felt like we’re fading and I thought that we went too fast into our relationship in the first place, so i started texting LJ and then i found out that he had feelings for me from the first week, I was surprised but yet still happy about it and I knew they were horible feelings to have when I still was dating Dom. I was thinking of braking up with him but I was scared, confused and didn’t know when or how to do it, I asked my friend for advice but all she could say is folow your heart, but that didn’t help because I didn’t know what I wanted, what my heart wanted , this draged allong way too long but one day Dom neded to talk to me he was looking angry and I was confused, he told me have i been texting LJ and have i been thinking of braking up with him, so I said yes because I didn’t want to lie, he just said you are dumped, I said fine but I wasent I actulay was realy upset I thought I knew what I wanted but I didn’t, I felt horible because I broke his heart I knew that because his friend told me and now LJ wants to be together but take it slowlie, so I said yes but I think I have made the wrong decision on who I like, I think I have feelings for both. But I just can’t figure out what I’m feeling

    • web admin

      web admin

      November 10, 2016 at 2:15 pm

      Because of the actions that you have taken have proven to cause harm to people, it is important that you take this time to look inward and understand your actions. Introspection may help you choose actions that will not hurt people in the future. Learn from this lesson. Do not take any action toward any relationship until you realize how your words and actions influence other people. Remain mindful as you move forward. Have a good week, Elizabete!

  3. Jayleen

    October 28, 2016 at 7:09 pm

    me & my boyfriend have been dating for a month now he told me he was inlove with me I feel like gen knows me now, but there are stuff he has yet to know about me & I’ve told him I wasn’t inlove with him as well he’s the first time person I think about when I wake up & the only person I want to be with is that enough to say you are inlove with that person? Are things going to fast?

    • web admin

      web admin

      October 29, 2016 at 11:31 am

      It is always best to be honest, yet remain respectful. If you are not in love, then don’t say that you are in love. If you think you are moving too fast, then make that feeling known. Whatever you do, continue to dating him if you want to do so. He may have stronger feelings for you, and it is normal for one person to feel stronger than the other. If you find that he is acting different, then it may be because of your conversation. Enjoy life and remain positive as you move forward, Jayleen!

  4. sàm

    August 29, 2016 at 11:26 am

    I met this is girl 2 months back. We really like each other. But I feel she is bit self absorbed .
    We started dating but I am not sure if its right choice. I trust her but I feel there is not enough love between us. I don’t know and when I see other girls I feel like hitting on them.

    • web admin

      web admin

      August 30, 2016 at 12:08 pm

      While you are dating her, be certain to not take any action of infidelity. The most important this for you to do at this point is to not cheat. If you are having these feelings, then it is clear that you are not having loving feelings for her. Treat her with the respect that she deserves and speak with her directly and honestly about your feelings. If she agrees, then you know what course of action to take. Remain positive and faithful as you move forward.

  5. Tom

    June 15, 2016 at 6:08 am

    So I have been with this girl for 5 months now and all of the sudden a guy she knew before me only for a month or two come back into town and asked her to hang and she said she doesn’t know who she wants and that she was in love with him and they never dated and only knew each other for 2 months and she said she is not in love with me and and can’t see falling in love with me. What do you think about all this?

    • web admin

      web admin

      June 15, 2016 at 5:33 pm

      Tom, it seems like she is having mixed feelings at this time. Perhaps she feels strongly about this other person. Make clear your feelings, but understand that everyone has their own insecurities and desires that they must deal with. Always demand respect from her, but give her the respect as well. If she feels like she can’t be good to you, accept that and be happy with yourself.

  6. Ruby

    December 28, 2015 at 4:06 am

    When do you think in a relationship is a good time to tell the person you “love” them?

    • web admin

      web admin

      December 31, 2015 at 3:49 am

      It all depends on your relationship. People fall in love at different points in the relationship, so it could be anywhere from a few weeks to a few months. When you are sure that you love your partner, go ahead and tell them. If they do not say it back, do not panic because it might just take them a little longer to fall in love.

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